A Vent.

photo credit: selva

I’m SO tired of SPAM! I know we all are, but really. This is ridiculous. WHO is actually buying all these meds and… erm… enhancements? Please tell me there really isn’t someone THAT ignorant! And the worse… lately I’ve been getting loads and loads of variations on the Nigerian scam. You know, where someone has a will with no heir and they have the same surname as me! And I can be that heir! And if I just give some perfect stranger ALL of my personal information! And… oh… a coupla grand to pay for all the transfers up front… I could be rich!! Really, who FALLS FOR THIS?!

So I guess the spammers are realizing that people aren’t falling for this? It’s a guess, but today I got this email:

The Federal Bureau of Investigation
FBI Seattle Office
1110 Third Avenue
Seattle, Washington 98101-2904
Phone: (206) 350-6981

The Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI), Has discovered through our intelligence Monitoring Network, that you have an on going transaction with a Financial Institution in Nigeria, as the owner of the said sum $7,500,000.00 USD confirmed on a certified cashier’s check.

So the Federal Bureau Of Investigation (FBI) Seattle, Washington in conjunction with The Economic and Financial Crimes Commission (EFCC), Has screened through our various Monitoring Networks and has been confirmed and notified that the transaction you have with the Financial Institution is Legal and you have the Lawful Right to claim your due fund. We advise you to go ahead with the transaction as we are monitoring all their services and networks. Be advised that any letter or claims notification received from anybody or company should be forwarded to us with immediate effect.

Meanwhile, you are advised to follow the procedure of the Financial Institution. They have their own legal procedure which we have examined and confirmed legal. Follow their instructions while you keep us updated for more details. You are advised to contact the necessary office for more details of transfer as we are monitoring every move now.

Please, be advised and be aware that your funds had been insured and the necessary charges would be taken care of by you, as confirmed by the Monitoring network. For your own good you are advised to confirm any transaction or lottery promo you have either involved yourself with in the past to enable us trace this scammers. Only the Financial Institution has been confirmed Legal any other are still under investigation, and so many others are scam, most especially from Nigeria and Africa.

You are to contact the EFCC Director of Operation Mr. Ibrahim Lamorde with the information below in regards to more details on your funds.

Mr. Ibrahim Lamorde (Director of Operations)
The Economic and Financial Crimes Commission (EFCC)
Phone: +234 1 479 0580
E-mail: efcc-ng@live.com

If you need to contact me at any stage please do not hesitate to call (206) 350-6981.

Yours sincerely,

Mr. Robert S. Mueller, III (Director)
The Federal Bureau of Investigation.

Wow! The director of the FBI wrote to me, personally. ME! To let me know that this transaction is legal. Whew! What a load off my chest. And it MUST be THE Robert Mueller because his email address says so - even though the reply-to is a different address. I’m sure that’s to forward to his secretary. Gosh, I would have guessed the director of the FBI to have better grammar and punctuation. And I’m not fond of them just monitoring my transactions. But so nice of them to tell me I’m going to be rich legally. /sarcasm

I’m so sick of spam!

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